Where Identity and Connection Evolve Together

When you’re expanding your identity, desire, or relationship structure, you shouldn’t have to choose between your truth and your partnership. You can evolve together without collapsing under old patterns, fear or misunderstanding.

Get support from a Poly-Friendly Couples Therapist in Boulder, CO.
David Lieberman, LMFT, is a clinician experienced in consensual non-monogamy, open relationships and evolving relational structures.

People Not Problems office in Boulder, CO

You might be feeling deceived or emotionally betrayed. You might be confused and wondering what this means for your relationship. You might be ashamed for wanting something “taboo.” You’re feeling stuck. You don’t have months to spend on slow, weekly sessions. You need fast, focused, expert support that helps both partners understand why your current system isn’t working and how to rebuild something stronger and more sustainable that is better suited to the relationship you desire.

This is not traditional couples counseling. This is a relational rebuild designed for couples dealing with affairs, emotional betrayal, secrecy, disconnection, or patterns that keep breaking the relationship.

Why Couples Choose an Intensive

Some couples reach a point where traditional therapy can’t hold the complexity of what you’re navigating. David offers kink-aware couples counseling without judgement or pathologizing. He can help when:

  • One partner wants to explore kink or non-monogamy and the other feels unsure or overwhelmed

  • You’re opening the relationship (or considering it) and don’t know how to build structure and safety

  • A shift in identity, desire, or sexual expression is creating relational tension

  • You want to explore polyamory or ENM without replicating old relational patterns

  • You’re trying to repair after a boundary violation within a non-monogamous agreement

  • You need clarity. Are we evolving together—or moving apart?

  • Major relational change requires a container that matches its intensity.

    David’s intensives offer the space, pace, and systemic framework needed for deep, transformational movement instead of months of circling the same conversations. You’ll experience a space where power dynamics, desire, and erotic identity are understood, never “fixed” or minimized. You will be able to move forward with clarity instead of pressure.

David’s Intensives Offer:

  • 18 hours of concentrated couples work in a single weekend

  • Or a structured 30-day immersion — built collaboratively around your lives, needs, and desired outcomes

  • A private, clinician-guided space to explore desire, boundaries, identity, leadership, followership, and relational truth

  • Experiential work that rewires the relational system—not just communication habits

  • A tailored approach for kink, poly, ENM, and open-relationship dynamics

  • Flexible scheduling (one weekend or spaced across two to three weekends)

  • A clear path forward when you’re unsure what “repair,” “openness,” or “alignment” should look like

Rebuild clarity. Rebuild trust. Rebuild the relationship you desire.

David Lieberman is a family and couples therapist based in Boulder, Colorado.  He offers 75-minute sessions and 30-day Intensives involving second-order change for couples dealing with betrayal, sexual intimacy issues, conflict, kink, Poly.
Learn more about David

A Different Approach to Kink, Poly, ENM & Open Relationship Struggles

Most couples counseling focuses on communicating “better,” talking more, or processing every emotion in the room. But when you’re exploring alternative relationship structures, the real challenge isn’t communication, it’s the system you’re trying to build together.

David works at the level of the system, not the symptoms.

Rather than asking one partner to “open up more” or the other to “slow down,” you’ll learn to create a relational structure that can actually hold desire, power, boundaries, autonomy, and connection—all at once.

During our sessions, you will:

  • Integrate identity, desire, and relationship so your expansion doesn’t become a threat

  • Work experientially, not just verbally—because transformation happens in doing, not only talking

  • Build partnership from mutual evolution rather than one partner adapting to the other

  • Create a dynamic where neither partner is the emotional manager nor the emotional avoider

  • Build structures that support autonomy and grounded connection, even during conflict or expansion

  • Establish safety, leadership, followership, and shared responsibility that works for alternative structures

  • Learn relational tools that function during conflict, in negotiation, and in the complexity of multi-partner agreements

    This intensive helps you build a relational system that honors who you are, how you love, and the future you’re creating together.

What this Intensive is NOT:

  • Not gender-defining

  • Not identity “exploration work”

  • Not a quick fix

  • Not talk therapy

  • Not prescriptive or template-based

  • Not about forcing one partner to accept the other’s desires

We’ll work together to:

  • Uncover relational language that reflects your truth—not a template

  • Build structures that make openness, kink, and expanded desire stable and sustainable

  • Create safety without shutting down desire

  • Transform your relational system so you’re not “managing each other,” but actually belonging to each other

  • Move beyond theory into embodied relational change

A couple sitting on a dock by a lake at sunset, embracing and enjoying the view.

after an intensive, you’ll walk away with:

  • A realistic path toward repair, reconnection, or resolution

  • Tools to rebuild emotional presence without losing strength

  • A functioning relational system where both partners can lead, follow, and evolve

  • A renewed sense of partnership — not resentment, avoidance, or imbalance

  • A way forward that feels grounded, honest, and possible

See if an intensive is right for you
Two white intertwined hearts on a dark teal background.

You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need a place where the truth of who you are—and the truth of your relationship—can finally be held with clarity and intelligence.

Before beginning any intensive work, let’s discuss whether my approach aligns with your goals and discuss which format best serves your relationship. Let’s start the conversation today and explore a new path forward.